


Elevator Music Is Not In My Control

by SpongeGuy



Series: The Milo Murphy's Law Wiki Guy AU [15]
Category: Milo Murphy's Law
Genre: Angst, Bonding, Humor, M/M, STUCK IN THE ANGST, Stupidity, Trapped In Elevator, VERY GAY FEELS, gay angst, more like it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-21
Updated: 2019-08-21
Packaged: 2020-09-23 05:07:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20334556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpongeGuy/pseuds/SpongeGuy
Summary: Brick and Dakota get stuck in an elevator. Watch as this time tested trope drives these two radically different men together, and see Brick finally confront his loneliness. Part of "The Milo Murphy's Law Wiki Guy AU".





	Elevator Music Is Not In My Control

It was another lovely, peaceful day in Danv…

“Why must you act like a total jerk 24/7?!”

…Never mind.

I see I was mistaken.

In a small apartment (that was much nicer than Cavendish and Dakota’s, I must add), Agents Brick and Savannah were engaged in yet another squabble.

Those were happening more and more frequently, as of late.

Savannah was standing with her arms crossed, ticked off and annoyed with her partner’s behavior.

“I thought it would be nice to eat out together at Chez Chaz, but no! Heaven forbid someone other than Brick decide what I do!”, she complained, an intensity and bite to her words not usually heard in their regular arguments.

Brick was furious too, as he paced around the room and kept pointing at her.

“I’m a jerk? I’m a jerk?”, Brick asked, hurt by those words. “What about you? You say I always choose, but you have no respect for MY ideas, no respect for MY preferences! I’m just some little idiot who follows you around!”

“Oh, Brick…”, Savannah started.

Brick looked up. Was she going to apologize?

“…You are an idiot.”

This was the last straw for Brick.

“That’s it! I’ve had it! It’s been like this for months! If you’re not prepared to see what you’re doing wrong in this partnership, then I’m out of here!”, Brick shouted as he put on a coat.

“That’s literally what you’ve been doing!”, Savannah shouted back, not caring that Brick was leaving. Maybe she’d have a few peaceful moments without that emotional lummox.

Brick went outside, and turned to face Savannah.

“You’ll miss me! You’ll see!”

He slammed the door dramatically.

Beat.

He then opened the door.

“Forgot Mr. Fuzzykins.”

Brick then took his teddy bear and slammed the door again, now with less dramatic effect.

Savannah just rolled her eyes. Why was she stuck with such a terrible partner?

Brick went out into the snow, bracing against the cold, but finding it more peaceful than his heart.

How angry he was at Savannah! How frustrated he was at her refusal to recognize his existence! Why couldn’t she give him the companionship he so deeply desired?

Brick considered his options, his face reeling from the heavy snow.

He didn’t want to do this.

Not really.

But Savannah had clearly stopped caring about him.

And as much as that hurt, he had no other choice.

No other way.

No other path than this.

Brick took the car keys, started the ignition and travelled to the future.

He put on HIS music. “That’s right, Savannah, my music!”, he thought.

As Gloria Gaynor belted out “I Will Survive” in all its raging glory, Brick sang along too, his spirit shaken but his resolve not.

He was going to ask Mr. Block to give him a new partner.

And that was final.

About 5 minutes later…

The time vehicle parked in a frosty lot, right next to B.O.T.T headquarters, its warm interior not matching Brick’s cold interior.

He entered the place in a most serious fashion.

One would not have been able to guess the roaring inferno waging inside him.

He passed the ground floor in a silent fury, ignoring the receptionist, the janitor, and Gretchen, car keys hanging off her breast pocket, who had taken her 17th coffee break.

In 17 minutes.

For those who didn’t know, Gretchen hated her job.

Moving on, Brick approached the elevator, his anger clouding his eyes, only being able to see Savannah’s smug face slowly leaving him.

Like everyone.

Well, for once, someone who wasn’t him would know what it was like to be abandoned!

As he punched the floor number of his required destination in the keypad, it turned out his ears had been clouded too, as he had failed to register the messy and rushing footsteps behind him.

The footsteps then slowly became a 40-something year old man, wearing ill-fitting snow boots, a tracksuit with a parka on top and a hairstyle that had turned white from the snow, not from stress.

“Whew!”, he panted. “I have GOT to get into shape.”

The man punched in his number.

As the doors closed, and “I’m Lindanna and I Want To Have Fun” started to reverberate across the elevator, Brick finally acknowledged his fellow passenger, who was no longer his fellow employee.

“Dakota.”, he greeted with no emotion.

“Brick! How ya doin’?”, Dakota asked, emitting a cheerful greeting that was a direct contrast to Brick’s.

“I’m… Fine.”, Brick said.

“Good, good.”, Dakota replied, and he shook his hair, snow dropping from his scalp and onto Brick, who frowned.

“Pardon my asking, as normally I wouldn’t care…”, Brick started, wiping the snow off of his clothes.

“Hurtful, but understood.”, Dakota stated, so used he was to Brick being a jerk to him.

“What are you doing here? You were fired. Or did you actually forget?”, Brick asked, an eyebrow raised at this odd behavior.

“It’s donut day. I never miss donut day.”, Dakota explained.

“Ah!”, Brick replied, now understanding. Back when they were co-workers, Dakota would ride in like Paul Revere to tell the masses it was donut day. He would then go on to give everyone a fair share of donuts, even Gretchen.

He didn’t like him, but he had to admit, it was a nice gesture.

“Wait… How did you get to the future? You have no time vehicle!”, Brick asked, confused again.

He would have preferred to not speak to Dakota any more than he needed to, but he was curious.

“Well, I begged and begged, but Mr. Block wouldn’t drive me. And then…”

We flashback.

About 5 minutes ago, Dakota walks out of his apartment, depressed.

“No Donut Day… (Sigh).”, he said sadly.

Suddenly, he looked up and saw a Time Vehicle.

“What the heck?”, he thought and he looked at the windshield.

On it was but a lonely note that said “Enjoy Donut Day. It’s always less dumb when you’re there.”

There was no name or signature.

Just an act of kindness.

“And that’s how!”, Dakota finished his explanation.

Brick nodded, silently pleased that that was the end of the conversation.

“I can taste that honey glaze now…”, Dakota said dreamily.

“Quite. Well, if you don’t mind, I’d like some peace and quiet. I have an important meeting to attend.”, Brick said, hoping he’d be able to do the impossible and get Dakota to shut up.

Never forget, my wonderful readers, everything is possible, even the impossible!

But today, that wasn’t going to happen.

“Oh, cool. What’s it about?”, Dakota asked.

Brick expelled an annoyed sigh.

“That part, where I said I wanted peace and quiet…”, Brick started.

“Yes?”, Dakota asked.

“It was directed towards you.”

Dakota nodded.

“I get it, you need some time to think. I won’t say a word. My lips are sealed, my mouth is locked, my volume is muted, etc., etc., etc.,”, he promised, and he pretended to zip his lips, lock his mouth, throw away a key, and mute himself with a remote.

Brick smiled.

Finally, he could focus.

He straightened his collar, he checked his breath, he ran his hands though his perfect hair and…

“I’m Lindanna and I Wanna Have Fun!”, Dakota sang along to “I’m Lindanna and I Wanna Have Fun”, bopping his head to the beat.

“Dakota…”, Brick started, annoyed.

“Right, right. Sorry.”, Dakota said, and he stopped.

Brick took a breath.

He straightened his collar, checked his breath and…

“Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm!”, Dakota hummed along to “I’m Lindanna and I Wanna Have Fun!”.

“Dakota… Please…”, Brick muttered angrily, his voice much sharper than before.

“Sorry.”, Dakota said, having forgotten to be quiet again.

Brick’s eye twitched, his fist clenched and his body shook.

He straightened his…

“Say, how long is it taking this elevator…”, Dakota started, but Brick had had enough.

“Gosh darn it, Dakota! When I say quiet, I mean quiet!”, Brick shouted, and out of anger, he hit the button that opens the doors.

“Brick?”, Dakota asked, suddenly worried.

“What?!”, Brick shouted in frustration.

“Look outside…”, Dakota said, and he pointed outside.

Brick turned.

“…Oh.”, Brick said.

No wonder the elevator was taking so long.

Instead of Mr. Block’s office, an office floor, or even the ground floor, all they could see was the bottom of a door, and countless cables and chains.

Well, not countless, but I don’t feel like counting them, and I doubt you want to.

Yes, it was official:

They were stuck in an elevator.

Brick bemoaned his luck.

“You have got to be kidding me! You have got to be kidding me! I’m stuck… In an elevator… With you!”, he said those last words with the most anger.

“Yeah… Bummer.”, Dakota said. “I’m gonna miss out on donut day.”

“Yeah, how terrible, how about the fact that I’m missing out on an important meeting?!”, Brick yelled.

“Oh yeah. That too!”, Dakota added.

“(Sigh). Whatever. Look, can you just help me get out of here?”, Brick asked, a palm stretched to Dakota and another palm covering his face.

“Don’t worry, Brick!”, Dakota said, optimistically as ever. “We’ll get out of here in no time!”

The two began to look for a way out.

“Climbing the chains could kill us… And unlike some bozos here, we’re not travelling back in time to stop that.”, Brick said, looking at the rule breaker.

“Well, we can’t, since I have no vehicle, and I assume Savannah isn’t waiting in yours.”

“You assumed correctly.”

“Gee, what’s my prize?”, Dakota said with a grin.

“Not being killed by me.”

“Eh, I wanted a race car, but I’ll take that too.”

They tried to close the doors, but they were now stuck too.

“Maybe if we push the buttons to our floors…”, Dakota suggested.

“Won’t work, but it’s worth a shot.”, Brick said, and he pushed the button.

Guess what?

“Well, I guess we have one option.”, Brick said.

“Yeah, jump out and hope we develop wall crawling powers.”

“Yeah… No! What?”, Brick asked incredulously.

“Hey, I got bit by a bug today. You never know!”, Dakota said, genuinely thinking it was a good plan.

“Ok, first of all, being bitten by a bug wouldn’t help us at all. Second of all, Peter Parker was bitten by a radioactive spider, so even if you being bit by a bug would help, it would have to be a radioactive one, which I assume…”, Brick laid into Dakota’s plan.

“Yeah, it was a beetle, but I still hoped.”, Dakota admitted.

“Look, it’s nice to be optimistic, but that was just dumb.”

“I see that now. Sorry.”

“It’s ok. You were just trying to help.”, Brick said, surprisingly agreeable.

Even if Dakota annoyed him, he did know that there beat a loving heart under all the eccentricities.

“Unlike a certain Savannah… She’d probably just laugh at me…”, he muttered under his breath.

He sat down in resignation.

“So… What do we do?”, Dakota asked.

“Emergency button. We leave a message, and hopefully, they come for us quickly.”, Brick directed at the button.

Dakota pressed the button.

“Hey, uh, this is former agent Vinnie Dakota and Agent…”

“Number 1 agent.”

“What?”, Dakota asked, turning to look at Brick.

“Number 1 agent. That’s how they’ll know it’s me.”

Dakota rolled his eyes. That was pretty sad.

But he obliged.

“And Number 1 Agent Brick. We’re kind of stuck… Well, not kind of, we are stuck, but you know what I mean. Anyway, we’re stuck in this elevator, please send help. Thanks!”, he finished, and the message was sent.

Dakota sat down.

“So now we wait?”, Dakota asked.

“Yeah. Shouldn’t take long, though.”, Brick said.

“Oh, really?”, Dakota asked happily.

“Yeah, people have been stuck in these elevators a few times. It always gets handled swiftly. I’ll get to my meeting in no time.”, Brick said calmly.

“And I’ll have my donut day!”, Dakota said happily.

“Yeah, that too.”, Brick waved Dakota’s wish off. It wasn’t important, he thought. What was important was his new friend… That is, partner.

“Yep. Any minute now.”, he thought with a reassured smile.

45 minutes later…

Brick and Dakota were still stuck in the elevator.

Dakota had been remarkably silent, sitting still and thinking of nothing.

Brick was seething with rage, the frustration, annoyance, and humiliation of the situation getting to him with every passing second.

“I’m Lindanna and I Wanna Have Fun” was still playing on endless loop (and I recommend that you subject yourselves to this torture so that you can relate even more to our protagonists. I am in no way asking you to do this because it will make me laugh).

(No way)

Brick was about to blow up. Even the smallest thing would send him ranting.

“…Do you think they didn’t notice our message?”, Dakota asked, wondering what was taking so long.

Brick screamed.

“WHERE THE HECK ARE THEY?! DON’T THEY KNOW I’M THEIR NUMBER 1 AGENT?!”, Brick shouted and shook his fists.

We cut to the 20th floor. Everyone is gathered for Donut Day.

Bright lights turn on and off, people are dancing, and everyone is on a massive sugar rush.

“Celebrate” by Kool and The Gang plays loudly and reverberates across the room.

Mr. Block, wearing nothing but speedos, does the worm.

“BEST. DONUT. DAY. EVER!”, he enthuses, and the crowd goes wild.

Back in the elevator…

“That’s my theory on what they’re doing…”, Dakota says.

“What are we gonna do, Dakota? I was only going to stop here for a few minutes tops, and ride off into the sunset with my new…”, Brick starts, only to stop when he realizes he’s about to open up.

“New what?”, Dakota asked, intrigued.

“None of your business, Moron!”, Brick says defensively, and turns his back on Dakota.

“Jeez, ouch! What did I do?”, Dakota asked, not liking the unnecessary criticism.

“Probably something! Why else am I stuck in this place? Everything goes wrong around you!”, Brick accused.

“…True, but this isn’t me! This is just bad luck. Or maybe Murphy’s Law… Whatever. Thing is, moaning isn’t going to help us.”

Brick hated to admit it, but Dakota was right. Moaning was only making an already terrible situation even worse.

But he had a right to moan!

“But I like moaning!”, Brick moaned and he took out his teddy bear.

“Why are you even moody today? You’re usually so smug on your high horse. Not that you have a high horse, that’s just a metaphor.”, Dakota asked.

“We actually did have one, but he ran away. Just like everyone.”, Brick muttered.

“What?”, Dakota asked, confused by what he had heard.

“I said his name was Serendipitacely.”

“That’s a nice name.”

“Thank you.”

Brick and Dakota sat in silence.

“So, why are you so moody?”, Dakota ventured again.

“Can you respect my privacy?”, Brick asked, hoping that statement would get Dakota to buzz off.

“Oh, sorry. I didn’t realize it was like that. Just trying to help.”, Dakota said.

That surprised Brick.

“…Help?”, he asked, a confused look etched on his face.

Dakota faced Brick.

“Yeah, help! Like, I know we’re not friends or anything, but… If I see someone who needs help, I try to help. So… You don’t have to, but you can talk to me if you need to.”, Dakota said, and then smiled.

He turned his back to Brick.

“Cheer up, Brick! Maybe it will take some more time, maybe not. But we WILL get out of here. And until then, I’ll be quiet.”

And so, Dakota sat quietly, and kept to his word, not making a single sound.

Brick observed that Dakota had also done that in the period of time where they waited before his outburst.

He had to admit… Dakota wasn’t so bad.

Unlike Savannah! That jerk! That meanie! That… Doo doo head!

Yeah, now that was an insult!

“I should write that one down!”, he thought, grinning evilly. Savannah would feel oh so bad!

…Not that he wanted to make her feel bad.

Just make her understand that he too had a voice! He too deserved companionship! He wasn’t just some bozo who should be left in the cold and ridiculed!

He was a person! Who deserved love, respect, admiration, first choice in Radio channels, first choice in restaurants, first choice in quips!

And his new partner… His new FRIEND would understand that.

“Just wait ‘till Savannah sees me and my new partner! She’ll be so jealI’m Lindanna and I Wanna Have Fun!”, he thought, and then covered his mouth, even though he hadn’t said anything.

Darn, that song was getting stuck in his head.

There had to be a way to change it!

But he could see no possible device that wasI’m Lindanna and I Wanna Have Fun!

No! Again? How ear wormy wasI’mLindanna and I Wanna Have Fun!

I’m Lindanna and I Wanna Have Fun?

I’m Lindanna and I Wanna Have Fun!

I’m Lindanna and I Wanna, Ok, it was very catchy.

He was annoyed.

He was angry.

He was bored.

And that stupid song was deeply stuck in his head.

Dakota looked over at him. He was clearly suffering from the same predicaments. Minus the anger.

“Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm.”, Dakota hummed.

Brick wondered what had become of his life.

“Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm.”, Brick hummed back.

Brick looked over at Dakota.

Dakota looked over at Brick.

They both sighed.

They shimmied next to each other, and waited for the song to loop to the beginning.

The final bars played, and the song re-started.

8 seconds later…

“I’m not Roxanne…”, Dakota started, nodding his head slightly.

“I’m not Aileen…”, Brick continued, nodding his head too, looking like he had resigned to a life of pain.

“I’m not Sharon-a!”, Dakota kept it up, now singing a little louder.

“And I don’t want to study…”, Brick continued, sounding slightly less annoyed, and moving his body from side to side.

“Work…”, Dakota chirped in, fingers wagging.

“…Or stay at home-a!”, Brick said, now getting into it.

The two began to headbang.

(She’s Lindanna)

“I’M LINDANNA AND I WANNA HAVE FUN!”, they sang out loud.

(She wants to have fun)

“I’M LINDANNA AND I WANNA HAVE FUN!”, they sang even louder, their hair bouncing and their fists pumping.

(She’s Lindanna)

“I’M LINDANNA AND I WANNA HAVE FUN!”, they sang, now standing up and looking at each other.

(She wants to have fun)

“I WANNA WANNA WANNA HAVE FUN FUN FUN!”, they sang so that everyone could hear, and started to play pat a cake.

“I’m not Veronica…”, Dakota sang, pointing at himself.

“Or Allison…”, Brick sang, pointing at himself with his winning smile.

“Or Donna!”, Dakota sang, his hand outstretched.

“And I don’t wanna scrub the sink or mow the lawn-a!”, Brick sang, his hand outstretched too and his eyes closed as if he was more passionate about this than anything else.

(She’s Lindanna)

“I’M LINDANNA AND I WANNA HAVE FUN!”, they sang and, locking their arms, began to frolic and dance.

(She wants to have fun)

“I’M LINDANNA AND I WANNA HAVE FUN!”, they started to disco dance.

(She’s Lindanna)

“I’M LINDANNA AND I WANNA HAVE FUN!”, They were now waltzing, quite gracefully, it must be added.

(She wants to have fun)

“I WANNA WANNA WANNA HAVE FUN FUN FUN!”, they finished and stood back to back, posing like Vanessa and Candace in “Busted”.

The song looped, but the two were too busy laughing.

“I didn’t know you liked to sing!”, Dakota said, while he wiped a tear from his eye.

“This song sucks, but it did kill 50 seconds.”, Brick admitted, taking a moment to regain his balance.

Brick suddenly stopped.

“Wait, didn’t you know I like to sing?”, Brick asked, surprised at this revelation.

Everyone knew that about him!

“Ah, no. We’re not friends. Remember?”, Dakota reminded, an eyebrow raised. 

Did Brick seriously not remember that he had ALWAYS treated Dakota with nothing but disdain?

Brick scratched his head a little sheepishly. He had never been nice to Dakota, and he had never seen him as anything but an idiot. 

But he had to admit, he seemed to be a decent guy.

“Well, now what?”, Brick asked, hoping that the awkwardness would go away.

“Well… We’re going to be here a while. Maybe we should just kill time. Do stuff.”, Dakota suggested.

“Ok… I guess I don’t have anything better to do. Pick something.”, Brick said, and he sat down, arms resting on the floor.

Dakota sat down too, arms behind his head.

“Well, I guess we could play…”

“No, wait!”, Brick interrupted, his hand raised. “I want to choose!”

“…But you just asked me to choose.”, Dakota said, confused.

“I changed my mind! I never get to choose with Savannah!”, Brick explained, his anger with his partner resurfacing.

“That’s not what I remember…”, Dakota commented.

“Well, you remembered wrong! Savannah never listens to me! I want to choose!”, Brick said, sounding a lot like a toddler, and less like a grown man.

“But you didn’t even give me a chance to choose! Maybe I’ll think of something!”, Dakota protested.

“Fine, I’ll give you a chance.”, Brick said, and Dakota started to brainstorm.

“Well, we could play charades!”, Dakota suggested.

“I don’t know…”, Brick said.

“…Or I Spy…”, Dakota said, hoping to illicit a positive response.

Brick yawned.

“…Or maybe we could get married…”, Dakota baited, wanting to see if Brick would fall in his trap.

“Eh. I don’t know.”

Dakota pointed at Brick accusingly.

“A ha! I had a feeling! You’re just going to keep rejecting my ideas until I give up and let you choose!”, Dakota said, a little ticked off.

“Because I CAN come up with something better!”, Brick said.

“Ok, ok! You choose a game! It’s not like it matters or anything.”, Dakota said, again confused by the odd behavior Brick displayed.

“Ok…”, Brick thought.

He quickly came up with something.

“I’ve got it! I saw this in a TV show from the past. I say something that starts with the letter “A”, then you say something that starts with the letter “B”, and we go down the alphabet!”, Brick pitched.

Dakota wasn’t too interested, but he obliged.

“Ok. Sure.”

Brick started.

“H’mm… Acorn.”, he said.

“Bathtub.”, Dakota continued.

“Cable.

“Doodle.”

“Elbow.”

“Freezer.”

“Goose…”

Dakota threw his arms up in the air.

“Ok, this is the worst game ever!”, Dakota complained.

“Ok, I agree, it sucks.”, Brick conceded defeat.

“Do you have any other ideas? Hopefully, none of them are as bad as that.”

“I doubt any of them could be that bad…”, Brick joked. “But no, I’ve got nothing.”

“I’ve gotta ask you… Why not just let me choose one? You had no pre-planned idea, and the only one you thought of was… Well, trash.”

“I just…”, Brick thought that maybe telling Dakota could help.

But no! He refused to open up. He wouldn’t have his heart broken.

“I just did, ok? I…”, he looked at Dakota and felt a twinge of guilt for being so jerky. “I… I guess I could try to listen to an idea of yours.”

So they tried some of Dakota’s ideas. But none of them really worked out.

“I spy… With my little eye…”, Dakota started.

“Something round?”, Brick asked.

“How did you know?”, Dakota said, astounded.

“It’s a button. A button is the only thing you can spy here, especially since you did the cables and me. And the roof. This is the 13th button you’ve done in a row.”

They sat in silence.

“Different game.”, Brick said.

“Ok, different game.”, Dakota agreed.

They then tried Charades.

Dakota pretended to be very wide and big.

“Um… Me after the Breakfast Burrito store?”

“When has there ever been a movie with that name?”

Cut to The Director from “Star Struck” filming a scene.

“Tobias! This is a serious picture! If you can’t muster the proper emotional range for “Brick After The Breakfast Burrito Store”, then what’s the point?”

Back in the elevator…

“Wait, you like breakfast burritos?”, Dakota asked, overjoyed to find a kindred spirit.

“Some might say too much!”, Brick replied.

They fist bumped.

“Preach!”, they both said.

Dakota again tried to get Brick to figure it out by moving around sensually and shaking his hips, something which cause an odd stirring in Brick, who began to sweat nervously.

“Dakota, I don’t know what it is.”

“It’s only the most famous movie of all time: “Neptune Needs Women!”

Brick face palmed.

“Never heard of it.”

“Well, let me tell you all about it!”

25 minutes of explanation/rant later…

“And that’s why this film is objectively the worst film I’ve EVER seen!”, Dakota emphasized as he finished his speech.

Silence.

“I’m gonna see it for the 70th time today, wanna join me?”

Brick, who looked like he wanted to die, hit his head on the wall.

“…I’ll take that as a no.”

They then tried 20 Questions.

“I guess it should be easier…”, Brick thought.

“Ok, First question: Is he a man?”

“It.”

“What?”, Brick asked, confused.

“You say “Is it a man?” “Is he a man?” is factually incorrect.”

Beat.

“Cavendish, I presume?”, Brick asked.

“Yeah, he’s been laying into my grammar.”

“Whatever. First Question: Is it a male?”

“Yes.”

“Ok, second question: Is he a real person?”

“Yep.”

“This is going great!”, Brick thought with a grin. “I’ll solve this easy thing in no time, thus killing off some more valuable time AND getting my fragile ego a much needed confidence boost! This will be as easy as…”

177 questions later…

“One Hundred and eightieth question… Is he… I don’t know, a sentient eggplant bent on world domination?”, Brick asked, exhausted and irritated with the whole thing.

Dakota pretended not to know.

“H’mm…”, he pondered, scratching his chin.

“OH COME ON, DAKOTA!”, Brick suddenly shouted. “You and I both know that we established that this guy is a human being!”

Brick massaged his temples.

“Please… God’s sake, PLEASE tell me who it is!”, Brick begged Dakota.

“It’s you.”, Dakota said simply.

Beat.

“I’M GOING TO KILL YOU!”, Brick shouted, and he lunged at Dakota.

“Oh my god! What did I do?”, Dakota asked, moving back to the wall.

Brick, a mad look in his eyes, walked around ranting and raving.

“How about everything?! How about talking nonstop like, like, like some kind of nonstop talking-inator?! How about being the worst at all the games you want to play?! How about prodding me over and over on what’s wrong with me?!”

Dakota took offence to that last one.

“Hey, I only prodded a bit! And I was only trying to help! You were acting weird, and I thought maybe I could help! But I can’t do that, because you’re a jerk! You were a jerk to me from the very first time we met, and even now, you can’t even bother to be nice to me! Every time we had a nice moment, you reverted to “Don’t try to be my equal, Dakota!”. I just wanted to help!”

They were both standing upright, looking at each other.

“I don’t need a friend!”, Brick shouted.

“I don’t think you deserve one!”, Dakota shouted back.

“You’re the biggest idiot I’ve ever known!”, Brick screamed.

“You’re not the number 1 agent! Everyone knows Savannah is better than you!”, Dakota screamed back.

“TAKE. THAT. BACK!”, Brick growled.

“MAKE ME.”, Dakota growled back.

Brick let out a primal roar.

So did Dakota.

They ran at each other and started to slap each other weakly, like when Drake and Josh would fight.

Dakota scratched Brick.

Brick bit Dakota on the arm.

Dakota slapped Brick.

Brick flicked Dakota’s nose, and then shoved him weakly.

But not weakly enough, since Dakota slipped and almost fell off the elevator.

“Dakota!”, Brick shouted in fear, terrified for his former Co-worker’s life.

Dakota was hanging for dear life, the fear very apparent in his eyes.

“BRICK! HELP ME!”, Dakota screamed, his grip loosening.

Brick moved quickly, and grabbed Dakota’s arm.

“Don’t worry, Dakota, you’re… Much heavier than I expected.”, he wheezed as he heaved.

“Sorry. I’m thinking of getting in shape.”, Dakota apologized.

“Don’t think, just do.”, Brick said.

He was still struggling.

The elevator suddenly started moving from the weight shift, making Brick nearly drop Dakota.

“OH MY GOD!”, Brick shouted.

“Brick… Brick…”, Dakota said, starting to accept his fate.

“DAKOTA HOLD ON!”, Brick shouted. He may have never had a connection to him, but he was NOT going to let him die.

“Take care of Milo Murphy, Melissa Chase, Zack Underwood, Amanda Lopez and Sara Murphy for me…”, Dakota said, heartbroken that he would have to leave them.

“And… And tell Cavendish…”, he shed a tear. “Tell Cavendish that I love…” 

But Dakota couldn’t finish. He began to fall…

Only for Brick, with all his strength, to pull him back up with both arms, and throw him back into the elevator, hitting a wall.

Brick gasped for air, and tried to calm down.

Dakota, rubbing his back, looked at Brick.

“Are you ok?”, Brick asked.

“Well, on the one hand, my back hurts, but on the other hand, I’m not dead, so…”, Dakota joked, and Brick laughed.

They both let out sighs of relief.

Dakota moved over to Brick.

“…Brick?”

Brick looked up.

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for saving me.”, Dakota said gratefully. He was truly touched. Despite everything, Brick had made sure he would live.

He’d owe him forever.

Brick just smiled a wry smile.

“Don’t be ridiculous. I may not like you, but letting you die… That’s not my M.O.”

He looked down, a little ashamed.

“And… If I’m being truly honest… You’re not a bad guy. Not at all.”

The two sat silently.

What do they do now?

How do you move on from such an event?

“I guess you could say I almost got shafted by that elevator shaft!”, Dakota quipped, laughing loudly.

So that’s how you move on. Huh.

He looked over at Brick, who had a very grim and serious look on his face.

“Dakota, you nearly died!”

Dakota silenced. Brick was probably right. The whole thing was probably psychologically taxing on Brick. It was not the time to joke about that.

“Don’t try to elevate the mood with puns!”, Brick suddenly joked, and his façade dropped as he began to laugh.

I see I was wrong. Again. Huh.

Dakota grinned.

“Yeah, these things really have their ups and downs!”, he joked.

Brick doubled over and then came up with another one.

“But you annoying me and then almost dying… That really pushes my buttons!”, Brick quipped, causing Dakota to laugh hard now.

Dakota cut off the sleeves from his jacket and dropped them.

“Must be fall, the sleeves are falling!”, Dakota joked, his eyebrows wriggling.

“Good one! Let me give you a hand!”, Brick said, offering Dakota his hand.

“You’re good too! This quipping thing suits you!”, Dakota pointed at Brick’s clothes.

“Thank you! I guess it could be a pun career choice!”, Brick joked again, and the two laughed on the floor.

“You like puns?”, Dakota asked, a tear in his eye.

“I always try to say one when Savannah and I finish a mission.”, he confided.

“And we won’t anymore…”, he thought, a pang of sadness striking his heart.

He would miss her…

Suddenly, he looked at Dakota.

For all the jokes they had just made, Dakota had almost died.

And it was Brick’s fault.

“Dakota…”, he started, not used to such a thing as “apologizing”.

“Yes?”, Dakota asked.

“I’m… I’m…”, he stammered and then calmed himself down, resolved to do what’s right.

“I am sorry. I am so sorry that you almost died because of me.”

“Oh, Brick, don’t blame…”

“No!”, Brick said, sitting close to Dakota. “I was the one who shoved you! You nearly died because of me! I am eternally sorry.”

And he was.

Dakota was forgiving, though.

“Come on, Brick! We were both going insane in there! And you weren’t trying to kill me!”

“…True. I just wanted to push you to the ground, not outside.”

“And you saved me when it counted! It was just an innocent mistake!”, Dakota said, and he smiled reassuringly.

Brick sighed in relief.

This guy was getting to him.

“Thanks, Dakota.”

“Sure!”

Brick leaned back on the wall and realized something.

They had been stuck here forever.

Yet… It hadn’t been so bad.

In fact, at times, it was downright fun!

Sure, some of the games were… Busts, but he did enjoy the company. And the singing and quips were fun!

And… Dakota seemed to show genuine concern for him.

Despite everything, despite almost falling to his death, Brick was forgiven immediately.

It didn’t matter what had happened in the past.

Right now, Dakota was the only thing he had.

And if they were going to stay here until they both died, he’d at least repay Dakota’s kindness by showing him he trusted him too.

“Dakota…”

“Yes, dear?”, Dakota joked.

Brick blushed.

“I’m just ribbing you! I have feelings for a different man.”

“Who?”

Dakota looked at him dryly.

“I’m gonna pretend you didn’t ask that dumb question.”

Brick shook his head.

“Whatever! Just… Listen to me.”

“Listening.”

Brick took a breath.

“I want to tell you what was bothering me.”

Dakota did a double take.

“What?! But you said you didn’t want me to know!”

“I didn’t…”, Brick admitted, but then he smiled weakly at Dakota.

“But after all we’ve been through… And if this is to be my final resting place…”

“Which sucks. Who wants to die in an elevator?”

“Yeah. It sucks.”, Brick smiled again.

“Anyway… I want to tell you.”

Dakota was touched by the gesture.

“Thanks, Brick. You know, it makes me feel that all we’ve been through was worth…”

“But you have to ask nicely.”

“What?”, Dakota asked, confused.

“This isn’t easy for me. If you ask nicely, it will make it easier for me to impart such personal information.”, Brick stated.

“…Ok… Please?”, Dakota asked, a dumb grin on his face.

“Try harder.”

Dakota sighed.

This was weird, even for him.

“Pretty please?”, he asked in a cutesy voice.

“Harder.”

“Pretty please with sugar on top?”

Brick was about to reject that when he was suddenly struck with a thought.

“Hold up.”, Brick requested, his palm up in the air.

“What now?”, Dakota asked, frustrated.

“I was just wondering… Why sugar on top?”

Dakota had to admit, it was a good question.

“I guess it makes it sweet?”

“How? It’s imaginary sugar. What can I do with imaginary sugar?”

“True, true. And I mean, even if you put real sugar on the words, like, if I was to write “Pretty please” on a piece of paper and then put sugar on it, how would that be a fun thing?”, Dakota asked.

“Right! I mean, I can’t eat it off the piece of paper, I’ll barely get any. And I can’t smell it. I can’t lick it. I can’t use it, really.”, Brick agreed.

“Unless you have a coffee mug and some great aim.”, Dakota interjected.

“And who says I do? This sugary promise is nothing but a sour delusion, a fake promise, an empty gesture.”, Brick preached.

“…What about cherry on top?”, Dakota asked.

“Now that’s better! I can eat a cherry on top of a piece of paper!”, Brick said.

“Yeah, but who carries Cherries in their pockets?”, Dakota asked.

“Who carries sugar in their pockets?”, Brick retorted.

“Good point. Actually, I think my uncle did that.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, really. He said it was just in case someone wanted sugar or cherries.”

“Did anyone ever want any?”

“No.”

“Too bad.”

The two sat in silence.

“So, pretty please with cherry on top?”, Dakota asked, returning us to the conversation.

“Right! That! Yes. I will now tell you.”, Brick said.

Dakota shook his head in humor. And they said he was weird.

“Ok, so, here’s what I was doing: I was going to talk to Mr. Block…”

“Fun!”, Dakota joked.

Brick had to agree.

“Yeah, not on the top of my list of favorite things. But still. I was going to talk to him and ask him for…”

“A pony!”

“…No.”

“A pool table!”

“…No! Though that would be nice.”

“A big cardboard cutout of Mr. Block in his speedos posing.”

“…Why?”

Dakota laughed. “Because… Because you’ll invite people over, and… And… And when they’ll enter the house, they’ll have to stare at that!”

Brick was silent.

“That may be the greatest thing you’ve ever said. I’ll make one right away.”

Brick then refocused.

“But believe it or not, that’s not what I came to ask for. I came to ask him for a new partner.”

“Oh, that makes sense. Wait, what?!”, Dakota asked, shocked.

Brick nodded.

“But… But you love being with Savannah! You’re friends!”, Dakota asked, still surprised by this turn in events.

“Not anymore! She was mean to me! She was bossy! Controlling! She only listened to herself! And she didn’t let me choose anything!”

Dakota took this in.

“Brick… You do all those things too.”

Brick looked at Dakota in surprise.

“What?”

“I mean, I don’t know 100 percent if Savannah does, but I have worked with you too for a long time. I know some things about you. I’ve seen her act like that a bit, and I’ve seen you act like that all the time!”

“Give one example…”

“My radio stations.”

Brick paused.

“Ok, fair, but…”

“You always pin the blame on her when something goes wrong. You always chose where you too went to eat. You got to name the time vehicle. You always shut her up. And just today, in this elevator, you kept trying to choose the games, you told me to be quiet, you insulted me, and you tried to beat me up.”

Brick was quiet.

Dakota was totally right.

A sentence he never thought he’d say.

But one that was totally true.

Had Brick always been like that?

“The only thing I don’t understand is why? You and Savannah work together so well, yet you act like that with your best friend! And she does too, if I am to believe your account of things, which, I must say, I do.”

“You do?”, Brick asked, surprised.

“Yeah. I don’t think you’re lying. She’s probably doing something wrong too. But that doesn’t make it ok for you to do that. And just abandoning your relationship instead of trying to fix it isn’t the right thing to do. Maybe it’s unfixable, but did you even try to fix it?”

Dakota got closer.

“Why? Why are you bossy?”

Brick felt uncomfortable.

“I don’t want to say.”

“You don’t have to… But it could help. I am here to help.”

Brick suddenly got angry.

“Someone wants to help me? Hilarious. No one has EVER wanted to help me! Not once in my entire life has someone wanted too! All my life people abandoned me! My family hasn’t been in touch for years, because I was such a disappointment! I spent all my school years alone! The only thing that kept me going was my determination to be a secret agent! So I went to the academy and I met Savannah! And I thought that she was the one that would not leave me! But just when I got someone, I decided that after years of being screwed over, I’d get to choose! I’d get to choose how life goes, instead of being hurt again! But now, here’s the irony, I am leaving her! Because I was such a bossy jerk!”

Brick suddenly realized what he was doing.

“I can’t do this. I can’t tell you.”, Brick turned around.

“Why not?”, Dakota asked.

“Because… Because I am Brick. And I can’t have friends.”

He looked down, morose.

“I had one friend and I hurt her. I’m not gonna hurt you. I don’t deserve friends. I don’t deserve anyone.”

Dakota felt terrible.

He wanted to help.

But Brick was practically impossible.

What could he do?

“I’m Lindanna and I Wanna Have Fun” was still playing.

It reminded Dakota that Brick liked singing.

“That’s it!”, he thought.

He cleared his throat.

Brick was still broken down and hunched up, trying to not look at Dakota.

Dakota started to sing.

“When you’re down… And troubled…”

Brick looked up.

“Dakota, please. I’m not worth it…”

Dakota continued, ignoring Brick’s protest.

“…And you neeeeeeeed some love and care…”

Brick tried to ignore the song.

“And nothin’… Nothin’ is gooooiiiin’ right…”

Brick still refused to look.

“Close your eyes and think of me… And sooooon, I will be there.”

Dakota edged closer to Brick, nearly touching him now.

“To brighten up… Even your darkest night.”

He was even closer now.

“You just call…”

“Please Dakota…”, Brick pleaded, tears threatening to come out.

“Out my name… And you know… Wherever I am… I’ll come runnin’… To see you again…”

Brick could feel Dakota’s breath on the back of his neck. He blushed.

“Winter, spring, summer or fall… All you have to do is call! And I’ll be there…”

Dakota suddenly hugged Brick.

“You’ve got a friend…”

That was the final wall torn down. Brick started crying, tears streaming down his face, his heart racing and his eyes clouded with an emotional storm he had never before experienced.

All the years of holding back, of hiding, of pretending burst through, as the pain of abandonment and failure finally was felt through every fiber of his being.

Brick turned to Dakota.

Dakota smiled.

“If the sky… Above you… Grows dark… And full of clouds…”

His voice was like a whisper, quiet and soothing, loving and nurturing.

“And that olllllld north wind, begins to blow…”

Dakota caressed Brick’s face.

“Keep your heaaaaad together… And caaalll my name out loud…”

He let Brick’s head rest on his shoulder.

“Soooon… You’ll hear me knockiiing at youuuuuur doooor…”

Brick looked up.

This man had annoyed him greatly.

This man had acted like a buffoon multiple times.

This man had also been there for him, helped him, made him laugh and had gone all this way for him, despite all the years Brick had treated him like trash.

The moment Dakota knew, he came to help Brick.

Brick would not let this go unnoticed.

If Dakota was going to be there for Brick…

Brick was going to be there for Dakota.

Brick cleared his throat.

And joined in.

“You just call… Out my name…”

Dakota smiled.

They both sang.

“And you know… Wherever I am… I’ll come runnin’, runnin’, yeah, yeah, to see you again…”

They both stood up and grasped each other’s hands.

“Winter…”, Dakota started.

“Spring…”, Brick continued.

“Summer or fall…”, they sang together.

“All you have to do is call!”

“And I’ll be there… Yes I will!”

Both were quite shaken.

“Now ain’t it good to know that you’ve got a friend… When people can be so cold… They’ll hurt you… Yes and desert you…”

Dakota wiped a tear from Brick’s eye.

“And take your soul if you let them…”

Dakota whispered the following part while Brick said nothing this time.

“Oh, but don’t you let them…”

They both sang now, Brick’s heart freeing itself, forgiving the world and itself for its mistakes.

And becoming the Brick he always could have been.

“You just call… Out my name!”

“And you know… Wherever I am…

“I’ll come runnin’, runnin’, yeah, yeah…”

“To see you again…”

They got ready for the big finish.

“Winter, spring, summer, or fall… All you have to do is call!”

“And I’ll be there, yes I will!”

They held each other’s faces.

“You’ve got a friend… You’ve got a friend… Ain’t it good to know, you’ve got a friend… Ain’t it good to know, Ain’t it good to know, Ain’t it good to know… You’ve got a friend… Oh, yeah, now… Oh, you’ve got a friend… Yeah, baby… You’ve got a friend… Oh, yeah…”

They finished, with a determined whisper.

“You’ve got a friend…”

They embraced.

Brick shed tears, but not of sadness: Of happiness.

Finally…

He had a friend.

And finally…

He’d be a good friend.

“It’s because I’m afraid of being alone. And my fear of being alone…”, Brick said, now understanding everything. “…Made me bossy. Made me want things to be fair. But it wasn’t fair to Savannah. I see that now. I’m gonna give more and take less. I promise.”

He looked up at Dakota, who had an aura about him that Brick couldn’t quite put his finger on.

“Thank you… Friend.”

Dakota smiled that winning smile that was making Brick’s heart soar.

“You’re welcome… Friend.”

Brick felt like he was about to do something drastic, but then, as if to save him, the elevator started moving up.

“We’re getting out of here!”, Dakota cheered.

“OH YES!”, Brick enthused loudly, and hugged Dakota.

The elevator was hoisted up and it was revealed that the one who saved them was…

“Mr. Block?”, they both asked, surprised.

“Yep! It’s me!”, Mr. Block said.

He was still in his speedos.

“Drop the elevator. Now.”, Brick joked, making Dakota laugh.

“I guess the message got through.”

“Oh, I didn’t hear it. Someone else did.”, Mr. Block informed.

“Who?”, they asked, surprised.

“I don’t know. I was left an annonymus text that said so. Whoever it was totally saved your lives, though.”

Brick and Dakota looked at each other and shrugged.

“Hey, Donut Day isn’t over yet. Want to join?”, Mr. Block invited.

Dakota was surprised at this.

“But I thought you didn’t want me to come?”, Dakota asked, confused.

“Yeah, but I’m so rushed on sugar I probably won’t remember. So go ahead and enjoy yourself! Bring Cavendish and Savannah, if you want!”, Mr. Block said cheerfully.

Brick and Dakota decided to go along with this.

After a long and joyous party, Cavendish, Dakota, Brick and Savannah bid farewell to the party and travelled back home.

Mr. Block waved wildly, clearly out of his mind, and Gretchen stood outside, an oddly soft smile on her face, as if she knew something they didn’t.

After parting ways, Dakota put a hand on Brick’s shoulder.

“Go and fix things with Savannah.”

Brick got embarrassed again.

“…I will.”

He did want to fix things.

But first…

He would take a walk.

To clear his mind.

There was so much to think about.

Like how he had made so many mistakes, and was now going to redeem himself.

Or how he wanted to make things right with Savannah and treat her right.

But most importantly…

Was the big new problem he had to face.

It had happened, slowly but surely as they were trapped in the elevator.

And he wasn’t sure.

But his face…

His voice…

His jokes…

His pure soul…

“Oh boy.”, Brick thought, now blushing furiously, but with an odd smile.

“I’d love a slice of that Dakota pie.”

Yep…

Brick was in love with Vinnie Dakota.

Post Credit Scene:

As Brick continued his walk, he felt as if someone was watching him.

He could hear loud footsteps, the sound they emitted sounding heavy and…

Inhumane.

Suddenly, he heard a whooshing sound, and a pair of red eyes suddenly appeared, watching him intently.

A giant… At least, he seemed giant, was standing in front of him.

The night sky and the dark clothes he wore hid his identity, but Brick wouldn’t have recognized him anyway.

“Agent Brick…”, said a voice, disguised for some reason.

Maybe to sound more intimidating.

“You know who I am?”, Brick asked, already in a defensive position.

“Confidential.”, the seventh shadowy figure said, and an odd sound was then heard.

“So… You love Vinnie Dakota…”, he asked.

Brick was shocked.

“I only figured that out, like, a minute ago. How do you know…”

“Confidential again. Now… If you will just comply… Everything will be just fine.”

Brick took his blaster out.

“You can forget it, you…”

But Brick couldn’t finish.

A heavy hand, harder than anything he had ever felt, backslapped him in the head.

He would be aching for hours now.

He collapsed immediately, wondering how any person could be so strong.

The seventh shadowy figure picked him up…

…Hoisted him on his shoulder…

…And left.

As he walked, silently, the figure laughed to himself.

“Oh, Vinnie…”

Lightning crashed.

“I thought you had better taste.”

He then got serious.

“I’m coming for you Vinnie…”

He smirked.

“We all are.”

As he walked away, all that was left in the abandoned street was Brick’s teddy bear, soaking in the pouring rain.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry that my posting schedule has been terrible. I'll try harder, my wonderful readers. I have no excuses, I just got lazy. Sorry.


End file.
